Meet the Seniors Who Don’t Tell Their Spouses the Whole Truth About Their Finances

Dishonesty about money has ruined many marriages. When you think of financial infidelity, you might imagine young couples who spend impulsively and then, out of embarrassment or conflict avoidance, don’t tell their spouses, and then when the other spouse finds out about the secret debts, a sense of betrayal compounds the financial stress, putting even more strain on the relationship. Meanwhile, a greater share of divorce cases are so-called “gray divorces,” where couples in their 50s divorce after a decades-long marriage; in those cases, lies about money are usually not the reason for the divorce, or at least not the only reason. You might think that, since you have already retired, and still married to the spouse you married when you acquired most of your retirement savings, that you have weathered the storm. You and your spouse may be committed to staying together forever and preserving family unity for future generations, but you also might be one of millions of retired couples who keep secrets with each other about money. It is better to be honest with your spouse now, instead of waiting for the truth to come out during probate, leaving the surviving spouse to cope with unpleasant surprises about finances, while also adjusting to being widowed and grieving the loss of a spouse. If you are not ready to talk to your spouse about your financial secrets now, you can at least contact a Bronx estate planning lawyer.

Be Honest With Your Estate Planning Lawyer About Everything, Even If the Thought of Revealing Your Financial Secrets to Your Spouse Terrifies You

People who have been married to each other for decades tend to have harmless secrets that their spouses don’t know; it is how they preserve their autonomy. Perhaps your spouse has a strict “no junk food” rule at home, but every day on your morning walk, you stop at Publix and buy a Snickers bar and a bottle of Coca-Cola. Maybe you and your sister have had a years-long text message exchange about a TV show that you both love, but your spouse thinks is trashy.

Financial secrets tend to be about keeping the peace related to matters where you and your spouse have agreed to disagree. For example, you might have taken out a loan that your spouse doesn’t know about. Maybe you gave money to one of your children without telling your spouse. If your money secrets could harm your spouse financially if he or she survives you, then you must address them now while you are healthy enough to do it. In the worst-case scenarios, the solution might be to file for bankruptcy protection or to sign a postnuptial agreement.

Schedule a Confidential Consultation With a Bronx Estate Planning Attorney

An estate planning lawyer can help you make peace with the financial secrets that you have been keeping from your spouse so that you can move forward and build an estate plan.  Contact Cavallo & Cavallo in the Bronx, New York to set up a consultation.

Source:

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