Personal Representative Drama and How to Deal With It
Imagine a bride with two sisters, each of whom wants to be the maid of honor at her wedding. As soon as her fiancé put the engagement ring on her finger, scenarios begin to play in her head about how to break the news to one or the other sister that she did not choose her for the role. Sorry, Beatrice, but you’re so pretty that, if I chose you, you would upstage me; I’m no beauty queen, but at least I am prettier than Bronwyn. Sorry, Bronwyn, but you have an emotionally fulfilling career, and I wouldn’t want to take you away from your students for all those boring menu tastings and that expensive bachelorette weekend; Beatrice is good for nothing except looking good in pictures. Then her mother-in-law comes along and orders the bride to choose her sister-in-law as the maid of honor. After all, the sister-in-law has no sisters of her own and therefore will never get to be anyone’s maid of honor. She threatens to cancel the wedding if the bride doesn’t comply. The bride calls her childhood friend to ask for advice about how to break the news to Beatrice and Bronwyn gently, and instead of empathizing, the friend throws a temper tantrum about how heartless the bride is for not even considering the friend as a maid of honor. Now imagine that any of this matters, and you will have an idea of what it is like to choose a personal representative for your estate. For advice on choosing a personal representative and notifying the relevant parties of your decision, contact a Bronx estate planning lawyer.
The Choice of Personal Representative Is an Important One, and It Is Yours Alone
Just as the testator of a will is the only person who can choose beneficiaries, the testator is also the only person who can choose a personal representative. You may choose any legally competent adult as a personal representative, and you may even choose a law firm. If you choose an individual, you should also list a successor personal representative, in case the person you listed as your first choice predeceases you.
Consider the age and health of the family member or friend you are choosing as personal representative. If you anticipate conflict during probate, you might choose the relative who is least intimidated by conflict or who is considered a neutral party in ongoing family disputes. Remember that every personal representative has the right to hire a lawyer to represent him or her in a probate case and to pay the lawyer’s fees from the estate. Therefore, you should choose someone who is not afraid to ask for help instead of someone who is too stubborn to do so. You should notify the personal representative of your decision, but there is no need to notify anyone else.
Schedule a Confidential Consultation With a Bronx Estate Planning Attorney
An estate planning lawyer can help you decide whom to designate as personal representative of your estate in your will. Contact Cavallo & Cavallo in the Bronx, New York to set up a consultation.